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I think I'm starting to freak out...

It hit me yesterday. I'm full of anxiety. I'll get to that in a moment...

First, let me get you caught up in what's been happening since my last post. We're pregnant. We had our blood test and the numbers for the beta test were consistent with a pregnancy. YAY!  Looks like those pee sticks really did know what was going on.
Our surrogate is awesome. She's VERY organized. Which I love
  Just in case the word Beastie in the above snap is weird...we decided to call our little embryonic/fetus "Beastie."  My husband (and I as well) thoroughly loves the Angelina Jolie Disney movie, Maleficent.  She calls baby Sleeping Beauty, Beastie. So that's what we'll call it going forward.

So now we wait...and wait...and wait... Until our surrogate flies back to Georgia to go for her 7-10 week appointment and graduation to *her* OB in Wisconsin. Which by the way is coming up in the next 2 weeks.

Projects in our house have taken on a new feeling. Now its not about getting them finished, its getting them finished with a deadline.  On my list of projects is to finish our kitchen. Not FINISH FINISH, but just finish. I'll have time to completely renovate later. For now its about getting the pantry completed, the coffee bar completed, and the kitchen ceiling put up. When my parents were here, we started the process of lifting the plumbing into the ceiling. This is the key to EVERYTHING right now.
Dustin helps my dad catch water from the cut supply lines.
 Once the plumbing is up in the kitchen ceiling, then I can put UP the drywall and the new lighting in the kitchen, then finish off the coffee bar area that goes next to the pantry. Then I can move on to the next step. The eventual nursery. It needs to be gutted so I can do insulation. I found when installing security cameras that there isn't insulation in the entire wall of the upstairs bedrooms. So there's still a lot to do. And on top of that, build a crib. It's not like its a lot to do, we've done more faster, I'm just looking at a different kind of timeline.

To top it all off. We got to see some new friends and their new baby. They are also gay dads.  They gave us a onesie as a gift for being pregnant. It didn't realize it until Dustin said something to me that getting that gift put a whole new spin on this journey.  Like, shit is real.  I've been playing this whole thing pretty close to the chest so that if things were to take a bad turn the number of people we have to tell is very small.  This also keeps the reality of the situation really thin.  Like its happening but its not really real, yet. Though now, since yesterday, everything is taking on a much different feeling.  I'm excited. VERY EXCITED. But I'm scared. Everything will work out, I know. But right now I'm freaking out.

Tonight is going to be a nice night of hanging out at home and doing some gardening with Dustin.

I just need a moment.


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